Human Relations

Merriam-Webster defines developing relationships as "the attitude or stance which two or more persons or groups assume toward one another." This section will look at how your relationships with others impact the teaching and learning process.

You'll learn about:

Relationships with your students
Relationships in your church community
Relationships outside your church

Student Teacher Relationships

In most cases you are with children for less than one hour a week. What can you learn about — and from — each other in such a short amount of time? What can you do to create a positive relationship with all your students? Here are a few ideas:

Be intentional about language. Use the pronoun we to refer to other people — parents, other teachers, paid and volunteer staff, or members of all ages and our to refer to your church, class responsibilities, or building. Even the youngest child will see they are a part of a community.

Tell your class your purpose for being together. Do they know why they are there or what you hope they will learn?

Work — and sometimes it is just that — to make your time together relevant to other experiences in the church and to children's daily lives. What do you know about the activities of their daily lives — books, TV shows, activities, movies, the latest fad, or what is happening in their school?

Don't ignore tough issues. Controversial or emotionally difficult issues may present themselves. Usually these conversations just happen — a child reports a death, a much-publicized hate crime has been committed, or a divisive political election is dividing your community and a child asks why. If you meet the child's question with silence, it may be seen as a signal that the church is not an appropriate place to discuss hard questions. Respond simply, honestly, and without judgement. "I don't know," followed by, "Let's find out who can help us talk about this," is often the best response. In order for faith to be relevant to the daily lives of children, the hard questions must not be ignored. And, it is helpful for youth to know you continue to develop in your understandings.
Help them look for the good in life. Just like you talk about tough issues, help children see that God created a world that is good. Children's lives can be filled with stress that is very real to them. You have an opportunity to help them relax and enjoy the good life!

Relationships In your Church Community

How can you keep relationships healthy with other teachers, parents, your learning planner, your pastor, and other members of your congregation? Some simple rules of courtesy will help.

Leave your space in the condition you found it — or better.
If you use something up, replace it (or let the appropriate person know).
Alert people ahead of time if you plan something that will change what they are doing — noise levels, schedule issues, or an especially messy — but worthwhile — art project.
Finish on time so others don't have to wait.

Relationships Outside your Church Community

What attitudes do you want children in your congregation to hold about people who are not a part of your faith community? How do issues or events happening in your community, state, country, or around the world affect what you teach or what children are ready to learn?

Your role is to interpret the beliefs of your church to the children in your class. Once again, language is important. Speak positively about your faith, without condemning others. Even your tone of voice can project a we/they attitude that you may not intend. Creating negative attitudes toward other people, however unintentional, can give a message that is contrary to the one you think you are teaching.

Developing relationships outside the church community often involves class projects. Look for opportunities that develop reciprocal relationships. This is a wonderful opportunity to learn about and from someone else, while providing for needs. Talk about serving with others rather than serving for others. Take care not to portray the people who offer Christian service as better than those who are being served.

Some ideas for projects include:

Participate in a project your church already promotes.
Call local social service agencies to find an appropriate match.
You can find global ideas at http://www.elca.org/globalmission/
The mission of The Search Institute in Minneapolis is developing healthy human relationships for entire communities by advancing the well being of adolescents and children. They have developed age-specific lists of 40 assets that contribute to healthy communities at http://www.search-institute.org/assets